Anxiety

So I have anxiety.  It blows.  It’s gotten worse since I started college.  I’ve been at my new school for a month and haven’t made any friends.  I think most of my anxiety is social.  I feel socially awkward and now I just feel lonely all the time.  Do you ever feel like everyone is in on some joke that you’re left out on? Like everyone’s staring at you or talking about you or whatever those people are laughing at, it has to be about you.  My boyfriend of three years lives about two hours away and sees me every weekend.  When I’m with him I feel happy and my mind is at ease; however, when he leaves it’s a different story.  I cry and beg him to stay even though I know he has to go to school too.  Without him, I’m lost and alone.  It scares me to think how much I have been relying on him for my mental sanity.  I used to be a very independent person, but now I don’t know.  It’s like I need him with me to feel okay, to feel sane.

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